Inner Drama, Iniquity?

Inner dramas and mind conflicts propagates and breeds within one’s self, they are both inevitable but combat is an option. The struggle to built them into the nature of life; and when men can make an enormous successful loop over this obstacle – he/she shall held the title of  a ‘Hero’.

Graffiti along Volga river

Interactions among two or more images that represent archetypes of the unconscious, normally perpendicular away from what’s parallel.

Why is it archetypal coexisting with unconscious?

It happens everyday, only that we might not be conscious of it’s presence. It may strike us just one bolt, erupting the rage and indignation. Leaving us in a fit of pique irritation, aversion and repugnance. It arises within us, the dark seed of inner drama and mind conflicts we play.

Vile?

More graffiti, old one replaced 

These are habits that we cannot break, and as we age there is more at stake. Dealing with more issues, interacting with more people. It’s something personal, a dent of iniquity that we are not showing to the outside world.

Call us fake but it’s a sin that everyone, I swear… everyone is struggling.

…unless you have no idea what I’m talking about.

Perpaduan

This is what I call true unity 

Need Sleep

Physics break

It’s been eons since I had ample sleep, I used to sleep more than 12 hours during those post-SPM days or summer holidays.

I even need to sacrifice my 30-40 minutes break up just to slam myself on the table to catch up some sleep before I drowse off in class. All this pre reading and intense so-called studying is engulfing away my sleeping time.

Screw day light saving for taking away an hour of my sleeping time.

Afternoon naps are merely possible as class finishes almost 5PM everyday. Only in my 1st year and I have a truckload of complains to be poured out. By the time I graduate I’ll end up debating instead of performing medical assistance to people.

Just to keep me going:

“You never achieve success unless you like what you are doing." - Dale Carnegie

Smooth

Life has been good lately, overload with the amount of work and studying but it feels good and contended when you realised that it all paid off pretty well.

Bio colloq especially went out surprisingly well; I self proclaimed that I was sufficiently prepared for it. Prepared answer schemes to cram with 2 friends to cram for a night. 4 hours of sleep wasn’t a big thing especially when I convinced myself that everything is just in front of me.

Yes, people can go on  “Hey, just stuff everything in your iPod/Phone or whatever methods.”

Personally, I feel remorse enough for being lazy but to cheat during colloq/exam something similar to that is plain disgusted. I won’t be proud of myself, at the same time paving my way to hell cause’ I’m sure God is fairly disappointed.

Same goes to Anatomy, it went out smoothly.

Sometimes we just have to escape from the self-sufficiency attitude and leave everything to God. Hard work, focus and tie a fair knot with a prayer and send the whole package to the Big One up there.

He will bring upon His favour upon those who desire Him.

30 minutes time to J.E Sunday service, I can’t wait to see what God has prepared for me.

A Mother Theresa Quote

“God never sends us more than we can handle." - Mother Theresa

Bombard

Monday & Tuesday have always been the worst day ever. Endless pre-reading & cramming to do for Chemistry, Anatomy & Histology on these 2 consecutive days.

Bio colloq this Thursday and I’m halfway searching every single corner of the internet, lecture notes. methodical notes to complete them a day before so that I am able to swallow them all at once.

Currently 1.30AM and my brain is facing a major blockage wondering what is extra dominance.

All this better pays off, no way being a defeated loser opening my book during exam. Might as well cram during the night just to be honest for goodness sake.

Mountain Dew

It’s really impossible not to do it last minute when classes end at 5PM and you’re bombarded with other subjects that require lots of studying. 

I promise to pamper myself by shipping 2 tees online.

Tea

Bottles of flavoured with Antioxidants found in some random grocery store on my way to Moscow, regretted that I didn’t get any.

I’ve resulted to tea instead of coffee since price of coffee increased absurdly by almost 30% of it’s original price; not forgetting to mention that it got jacked up along with other regular food I normally order for break as well.

There’s goes my lunch break, it’s either I start bringing my own food in Tupperware or survive with air and planktons. 

Zits are erupting like mad; I resort to increase my vitamin C intake by doubling up fruits and consume at least 5 pills of Vitamin C, B & multivitamins.

I found a new subject to loathe over - Latin

Cinnamon Buns

A sudden crave & sugar rush on regular Sunday mornings. I had one of these scrumptious homemade cinnamon buns last week made by grumpy sis Lily Chong.

  Baker behind the buns

Lethargic enough being a couch potato in front of watching some cheerleading searies ‘Hellcats’ munching on oat cookies. I promised to make myself pancakes someday… x100 I’ve mentioned this.

Going to put on my ‘CYW’ tee this weekend

Cell Group

Last days of winter taken around 7AM on my way to Moscow

We had our very first cell group today at Jun’s place along with Kelvin, Lily, Jun, Mike & myself. A time to study God’s word, strengthening our walk with God.

Trees at 0 degrees Celsius

Hiroshima’s cell group really inspired me to get myself geared up and really expressed my talents God has planted in everyone. Appreciate Kelvin in his effort to bring us together for a short session of family time as well as bible study.

Anticipating J.E’s Sunday service tomorrow :)

Food & Price

Cooking is wearing especially when it comes to washing up dishes, pans and pots. Been making lots of mushroom cheese sauce chicken chunks lately in order to get it perfect. Pleased with it myself, hence… now is the time to shift from cheese to some other recipes.

Muesli/bananas for breakfast, croissants & coffee for break, skipped lunch/evening break and finally a proper meal for dinner.

That’s my daily cycle. What a bummer, either that prices of food have been increased radically or that the pathetically reduced portion of the same price.

Coffee costs 15 rubles instead of 12, an excuse to switch sides to tea as my daily dosage from now onwards. 

***

Spring is nice, walking to main campus when it’s 0 degrees Celsius with a jacket, hoodie inside and light scarf. It even snows every now and then, minus the loathsome mud everywhere… spring is blissful.

My 4 year old basic black Converse is approaching it’s death with it’s opened sides :(

Middle

Arbat Street, Moscow, a fine weather of 0 degrees Celsius.

“Stuck in the middle without knowing which way to go, no decision made.”

It’s hard to be a true friend without being able to be honest especially when it comes to disagreement and objection. I’m a master of disguise, or at least being obliged to in order to mingle and blend in.

Hypocrite!

I’m beginning to have a feeling that what I expressed abstractly draws no attention from anyone, that’s the use of good listener buddies – to understand. 

Nature. Change

Morning walk with Mike along Arbat street in Moscow; front of Starbucks

The way we see our own reflections from changing angles in the past allows us to make us realise how much we’d changed. Is changing that scary?

People asked me, how would you view yourself in 10 years time? I personally wouldn’t even have the guts of thinking about graduating med school, what more to say 10 years time?

Everything’s blurry, obscure and vivid; unpredictable and sudden. Things can change instantly or along with pace despite we find it reluctant to occur.

Pigeons in Moscow

The inevitability that everyone will change seemed doleful, I know I find it forlorn. But as people live on, they change. We ourselves as well, so don’t feel left out when the world is changing drastically because it’s our nature to change along with it.

Whether at pace, accelerated or slightly dawdling. We all change.

I just hope that the people around me doesn’t change away from my circumference.

*INSERTS ENDLESS LIST OF PROFANITIES, EXPLETIVES, CURSES*

Loosing my 2 year old plus N78 is bad enough, now to face Latin colloq on Monday, Chemistry colloq on Tuesday and also Anatomy on the exact same day with facial and neck muscles is plain %&$#%!!

No, I'm not getting a damn new phone unless I undergo metamorphosis and survive with plankton.

Don't talk to me. It's bad enough to loose a phone but adding salt to its wound... gee thanks.  

Ang Pao

I know that it’s been a long time since Chinese New year, nevertheless here are some CNY crafting made by deco team from Kim. Thanks a bunch Mike, Eelin, Jacquelyn..

and also Hiro team that made the other half of the firecrackers.

Moscow, CYW Day 2

Change Your World 11’ Charity Concert was simply amazing, had celebrities performing like Nuteki, Saved, Simple Stuff, Vince from Akedemi Fantasia, Juwita Suwito and performance by students.

Everything was in such a rush, bummer that I couldn’t stay much longer to catch up with some friends from other parts of Russia.

Nuteki

Crossroads

Vince AF

Crowd [Apparently all photos are unedited, raw. Not as good as DSLR but works fine]

Short clip of Vince singing ‘You Raise Me Up’ I was really shocked that his voice improved so much!

‘The Prayer’ by Vince & Juwita, it’s good on video but it drove everyone speechless when heard live.

Yuri Ignatov, Russian Idol

Closing song – Heal the World

Overall, a trip to Moscow for such event was worth it and amazing. Being really inspired by those in Moscow, just students but being able to organize such an amazing event.

I’m gonna miss this so much.

Moscow, CYW Day 1

One of the 7 sisters in Moscow, night view was fantastic but apparently products from digital cameras taken at night takes too much effort of editing. So I snapped this on my way to Starbucks with Mike.

Along Arbat Street 

Statue of Alexander Pushkin & his wife

Some more statues made out of plastic wrappers

Pushkin’s front door and they even had a stretch of souvenir shops named under him.

Some shop selling Russia’s trademark mastroshkas and some scary looking hand made dolls that Mike calls them art.

Books sold everywhere, dirt cheap. Approximately 20 rubles each which rounds of to less than RM3 per book.

Buns and pastries that looked so fake but apparently they’re real. Unlike those in Malaysia that are actually real, looked damn good but priced up to 10 times more than the ones I can get from here.

Some nice keychain costs up to 500 rubles [RM50] per piece.

Moscow is definitely a place worth traveling for.

Polaroid & Hearts

Flight/Train

Searching for flights online is such a pain in the ass. I have too many in hand that are desperately needed to be settled.

Volgograd – Moscow – Vienna – Prague – Budapest – Prague – Kuala Lumpur – Kuching – Kuala Lumpur – Moscow – Volgograd

Flight or train, all the same. Of all the transportation I’m only done with O-N-E which is Moscow to Vienna.

Still this journey is not even confirmed yet cause’ I might be joining mission trip somewhere in Malaysia and I’d need to add up an extra destination to this long exasperating list of mine.

Wished I could just chew on a credit card and drag those dead scientist back alive to invent a really damn good teleporting machine instead of making up theories that only make my text books thicker.

Torture

Fairy Tale

Today is a fairy tale, what differs it from other fairy tales is that this particular one actually came true. Really blessed to have friends like you.

CYW Charity Concert

I was away for a couple of days to Moscow to attend ‘Change Your World'- charity concert 2011’, thanks to special hosts from MMA for having us around.

We had diagnostic session with Dr. Shan Ong even though I was like a lost chicken in the midst of all the senior med students.

Charity concert was all in all amazing, I’ll most probably blog further more about this when I manage to gather some pictures.

Here’s an amazing promo video about this event.

My holidays were so amazing, meeting so many amazing people. Now back to reality, a real great boost!

Psychology

The number of students  attending Psychology lecture seemed to decrease by the weeks, it’s not all in all boring. It does appear to be interesting when we’re learning psychic skills and personalities defining who’s choleric, melancholic and psycho.

The moment before Mike says : “Hansleeeyyyyyy…” sternly.

The point where I normally spend 45 minutes sleeping and 15 minutes snapping random pictures of people around me, then ignoring what the lecturer craps and following up by reading Anatomy.

How on earth did Kay Chai & Steph Lim survived psychology as their degree, salutes.

One Soul Mate

Avery: Soul mate? You gotta be kidding me with this crap, Lexie. Nobody has just one soul mate. That’d be such a dumb system. You deserve better. And there is more than one soul mate for everyone… and someone like you? There’d be a line out the door as soon as word got out.

Lexie: Oh, would you be in the line?

Avery: Yeah. I’m in the line.

Grey’s Anatomy Season 7, Episode 16 ‘Not Responsible"’